Monday, November 16, 2009

Bad Times

I’m not doing well.

Believe me, that’s a sentence I hoped never to write. However, I’ve no choice, unless I wish to kick the truth aside.

Not doing well. That’s why it has been so long since my last entry in this blog. I now spend almost all my time in bed, so tired I can hardly walk, weak, uninterested in any food other than chocolate ice cream.

I want to write. Not just this blog. I have a novel to rewrite and, of more importance, my memoir. I try to write. But I can’t really. My memory is fouled by chemotherapy. Not just my memory of dates and names but my memory of spelling, of dates, of real happenings in my life.
As bad as I feel, as skinny as I am thanks to chemo, there’s still hope that I’ll get past the treatments and have a year or so to feel better and write and maybe head up to Virginia or someplace with Lynne. I hope that happens.

Now, though, I need to stop writing. I’m too tired.

17 comments:

Wild About Words said...

Love you, Kieran.

Donna

Daria said...

Hoping you get some strength back ...

Sylvia said...

I'm willing you that year and more, Kieran, as are all your friends.
In spite of the ravages of chemo, though, you're still an eloquent writer. The blarney lives on.
Good luck with the writing!

Unknown said...

Hi Kieran,
Happy to see your recent blog, sorry you are feeling so bad. Wishing you and Lynne a good Thanksgiving together. "Keep the Faith" as we used to say, we are all willing you more "good" time. Thinking of and praying for you.
As Always,
Patti

Anonymous said...

Kieran and Lynn,
A Merry Christmas to you. May God's peace and love cover you this Christmas and see you through the future.

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Dennis Pyritz, RN said...

Great Blog! You are a credit to the cancer blogging community. I have added you to my blogroll, “Cancer Blogs” with over 700 other cancer blogs at www.beingcancer.net, a cancer networking site featuring a cancer book club, guest blogs, cancer resources, reviews and more.
If you have not visited in a while, please stop by. If you agree that the site is a worthwhile resource for those affected by cancer, please consider adding Being Cancer to your own blogroll. And like bloggers everywhere, I love receiving your comments and ideas.
Take care, Dennis

Anonymous said...

Kieran Joseph Doherty, 64 of Lake Worth, FL died Saturday, February 6, 2010.

Rest in peace.

http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/palmbeachpost/obituary.aspx?n=kieran-joseph-doherty&pid=139552973

Great...As Always said...

Praying that you remain strong and positive. Look to God for strength. Recommend that you read Suzanne Somers book "Knockout" and get off the chemo!

lani said...

The joy of the Lord is your strength

Unknown said...

Kieran passed away on Feb 6, 2010, losing his long battle with lung cancer. Those of us who knew and loved him, will miss him always. He was my friend, since our teens, and first husband. He was cherished, in spite of his alcoholism, in the early years. I was so proud that he acheived his goal to be a published author! I suppose this blog will just fade away, but the memory of Kieran will live on in our hearts.
Love you always,
Your "first wife" Patti

Snowbrush said...

I am so very sorry he is gone. I would have enjoyed knowing him.

John said...

I ran across this by blog by accident. I see the last entry is Nov 2k9. I hope oyu are still fighting...

Shalet Jimmy said...

I do not know what to say.Get well soon.

Patricia DeFosse said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Patricia DeFosse said...

To the family of Kieran, I am truly sorry for your loss. My father was fighting cancer in 2008-2009, until he too passed away. This blog in particular makes the last memories that I have of my dad vivid in my mind because what Kieran wrote is so similar to the condition that my father was in earlier that year. His memory was also fouled by chemotherapy, causing him to lose track of dates in particular. Everyday my father would ask me what day it was as he laid on the couch. My dad was rather lean to begin with, but after the chemo he was extremely frail. It was almost as if his body was disintegrating as time went on due to the radiation and chemotherapy.
He still managed to enjoy the last years of his life before he was too sick and it was time to let go. It seems as though Kieran did the same, using writing as an outlet until he was not longer able to. I think it is inspiring to see others deal with tragic circumstances in such positive ways. Everything happens for a reason, and at least they are no longer in pain. Thank you for sharing.

Recomenzar said...

i love your writing